75. Any given Sunday

because I like you so much

hello Milady
how are things
going?
I hope really well

I write despite of
no certainty of
ever reaching
you again

I just needed to
tell you something

I didn't realize
how selfish
I have been
up until now

always seing things
from my perspective
and confusing
caring with possessing

It's just that
I got so
attached
at a time

and anyone
who can get
to know you
will surely
understand me

in the end
I'm only human

I don't know
about you
cause I
can only talk
for myself

but you
swept me off
of my feet
I got knocked down
by your
sweetness
your charm
by your whole being

knowing you
was just
unbeareable
beyond
measure

and you
existing
and crossing
through my path
at that particular time
-though timing
could have
been a little better-
was a marvelous
coincidence

you must know
I don't believe
in fate or destiny
I'm more of a
craftsman of happenings

so I think of it
as a strike of luck
and what a strike
it has been

my idea of you
has not changed
a bit
just to make it clear
I still miss you
I still care for you
I still long for you
and your magic stories
that really took me
far away
you still come
into my dreams
and that
is something
I can not change

now there are too many
things in my everyday life
in pop culture
in the music I listen
in what I read
what I eat
that reminds me
of you
in our little world
that we created
I can't conceive
erasing your image

every word
I've ever said
I've ever written
every little thing
I've done
every stare
and every attemp
are the purest
truest
I've ever
given to anyone

I miss your
soft words
caressing my soul
and how you
showed you
really cared

that being said

I realized
I have to stop
being so selfish

me writing
and expressing
myself to you
may have not been
of much help
in your moving on

I'm sorry for that
in particular

not for what
we've been through

you may
have noticed by now
that this one
is not a poem
but sort of
a transcription
of a phone call
or that conversation
we never had again
sitting at a cafe
while you're having
a latte and a croissant
and my coffee
just got too cold
for talking
way too much

I feel good inside
now
and every time
I think about you

cause I see
we helped
each other
in our transitions
and got the better
out of it
to help us
in each of our lives
and in the
real appreciation
of everyone around

I hoped I helped
you a little
in having a better
understanding of things
just as you've made
a better man
of me

It's still a long way
to go
still many hard roads
to come
I know

but if it
can give you
a little push
to reach the end
of something
or that one last breath
when needed
remember me
for I
will feel you
no doubt about it
and hope
you can feel
me too
because I will
send
all my best
to you
like I
always have

I wouldn't know
if this can be called love
but is the closest
I can imagine

and that
from me
you'll
always have

and that's that

I look out
the window now
and it's that time
when this hand-painted
beautiful orange sky
splashes everything around
and I'm not sure
if it's just dawning
or we are close to
our dusk

so
until we find
each other
by luck
again

thanks for
everything
you've given
to me
all along

carelessly
unknowingly,
my dearest

Remember me 

Though I have to say goodbye

For ever if I'm far away I hold you in my heart

I sing a secret song to you

Each night we are apart

Remember me

Each time you hear a sad guitar

Know that I'm with you

The only way that I can be

Until you're in my arms again

Remember me...